The Navy Destroyer Captain

A Navy Destroyer, which is a huge battleship, is traveling on a foggy morning, with horrible visibility, and the lookout sees a beacon light flashing ahead. He reports to the captain, who has the crew hail the source of the beacon on the radio. The captain says, “tell them to change their course 5 degrees starboard”. They radio the message, and they get a response back saying “change your course 5 degrees port”. The captain says to notify them, “change your course 5 degrees starboard immediately or we are going to collide”. The response comes back, “change your course 5 degrees port immediately and there won’t be a collision”. The captain says, “YOU TELL THEM this is the captain of a giant Navy Destroyer Ship speaking, and they better change their course 5 degrees starboard immediately, because they don’t want to collide with a vessel of our size!”. The response comes back, “change your course 5 degrees port immediately, because this is the lighthouse you are talking to”.
Some things that seem impossible can be accomplished by virtue of hard work, creativity, persistence, etc. There is much to be said for the person who insists on finding a way to get something accomplished, no matter how difficult the task. I am a firm believer that you must be a “find a way to get the job done” kind of person to be truly successful in life.
On the other hand, we need to be sure that what we are trying to accomplish is the right task or tasks. The moral of the story with the captain destroyer is, some things are beyond your control, and your efforts can be much better spent working on things that are within your control, rather than fighting against things that are not. If you are spending your time and energy trying to change your spouse or someone close to you, you are probably fighting a losing battle. You can definitely improve your life by working on you, and I am a firm believer that the more personal development you do the better your life will get, but you can’t change someone else – the decision to change is a decision people can only make for themselves. If you spend all of your time and energy complaining about the economy, the government, the country, or the world, you got a tough row to hoe. If, however, you find the flaws, and figure how to best work within these systems, or even come up with ideas that solve problems that are common to many, then you are in business (or at least you should be). One of the secrets to life is figuring out the fights that are worth fighting, so you don’t waste your efforts trying to get a lighthouse to change its course.

MAKING IT PERSONAL

On occasion, when politics comes up, friends or colleagues ask me why I seem sort of ignorant of candidates, causes, etc. This is just my personal leanings, and many very successful people disagree with this completely, but I don’t spend much of my time on political issues. I discovered long ago that, for me personally, I could spend a pound of effort trying to influence political issues, and I would get back only an ounce of return (very little influence on a vote outcome, etc.), but I could spend an ounce of effort figuring out the best way to work within the existing systems, and get back a pound or more of return (for example, I don’t make knowing every candidate’s stance on tax law changes my personal agenda, but I do make sure I know the changes that are happening, how they affect me, and how to make the most of the existing laws and/or future laws as they pertain to my business).
Now, here is something that kind of makes me a little sad. I drive by LRMC (the local hospital) on my way to work most days, and I routinely see people “picketing”. For example, I saw one person there every day, for over a month, carrying a sign complaining that they received a $3K procedure that they didn’t want. They probably gave up 200 hours of their life, or more, to let those driving by know how mad they were at the hospital. Do they think it mattered much to the people driving by? What could they have done that would have helped their cause more? First, did they make sure they had the appropriate insurance coverage to begin with, and, if not, are they getting it to prevent a similar situation in the future? Second, did they take the right approach, and talk to the right people, about trying to resolve the issue in their favor as much as possible (or did they just scream and yell a lot at whoever came on the line whenever they called)? Third, if there is a cause involved that they care about, which I doubt, then is there a better, more productive way to take up for that cause? Fourth, and lastly, did they evaluate what the 200 hours of their time spent carrying a sign was costing them? It would have cost me more than $3K, so I would probably be cutting off my nose to spite my face. Plus, if their time isn’t worth that much, then they should worry more about improving how much their time is worth, and less about being angry at a world that is probably largely just doing what it is supposed to be doing – which may very well be giving someone the best possible care in spite of themselves… Then again, maybe if they persist long enough, they will get that lighthouse to change course 5 degrees starboard!
I spent many an hour trying to back down lighthouses in my life before I discovered personal achievement (complaining about things I had no control over and/or fighting battles I couldn’t win used to be a regular thing for me), but I just couldn’t get most of them to budge… Today, I still hit a bump in the road now and then. Do you have any lighthouses in your life, that you are working fervently to get to change course 5 degrees starboard, and if so, are there other things you could do with the time and energy being spent that would help you to have more success and happiness in your life? If so, I wish you Godspeed in recognizing those issues, and changing your focus, so you can do more, have more, give more, be more! Best wishes from a former Navy Destroyer Captain - LOL!


'And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.'

Best wishes,
Chris Lund